A Lay Cistercian reflects how to burn away the old self-using the fire of discernment. I enjoy watching the television series entitled "Forged in Fire" as much as possible. It pits four blacksmiths who forge knives and swords to compete against each other. They must design, forge, create a handle and have their handiwork tested. The winner gets a cash prize.When watching this program, I am reminded of discernment, in that it takes a refiners fire to heat, shape, quench and take out any imperfections in the metal. Discernment in the spiritual life, as it applies to join a Lay Cistercian group, means we place ourselves at the disposal of God and his will. With humility and obedience, He shapes us into our true selves using the fire of His love. This takes work and also beating the metal (our false self) into a new shape (our new self) on the anvil of transformation. Spirituality is not easy. It takes constant attention to sustain the Faith. To be a Lay Cistercian, it takes Cistercian practices and charisms to forge our wills to make all things new. Discernment, properly understood is not just a period where you test your resolve to do what you say you will do, but it is also the realization that you must take up your cross daily to move from self to God. Here are some ideas that will help you with contemplative spirituality.