The only thing constant in Jan's life was change. From the time she was a baby until her twenties, she and her family moved over forty times, mostly because of an alcoholic dad who couldn't hold a job, but also a mother who was gradually descending into alcoholic denial as well. Her family of five siblings and two parents expanded and contracted depending upon divorce, alcoholic denial, and economics. Her parents divorced when Jan was five, and she and a beloved older sister were left with their grandparents in a small town while their mother went to the city with her other siblings to find work and a way to support them. Jan learned to cope with abandonment and loss through stable grandparents, small-town life, and her sister's love. Once her family reunited, new challenges surfaced and a chaotic welfare-dependent life followed. Jan and her siblings all met the challenges differently, with varying consequences to their family life. Jan took on the role of codependent family caretaker as she struggled against family dysfunction. Just when her life took a turn for the better for her and her daughter, a new life-threatening health challenge emerged which took her in a completely new spiritual direction, forcing her to choose between two risky alternatives. Through all the transformative challenges, Jan's spiritual life, her own intuitive guidance, and active dream life kept her afloat, with Spirit's light ever present through the darkest of times.