A report of the spiritual journey of the author. Childhood in Japanese prison camp in Indonesia during WWII; return to Holland; several years in Italy, where her quest for spiritual knowledge starts; again return to Holland and study of astrology, Theosophy and New Age ideas of Findhorn Community in Scotland; brief acquaintance with teachings of Gurdjieff; encounter with Sufism of Hazrat Inayat Khan and long studies and work in Sufi Circle; pilgrimages to tomb of Inayat Khan in Delhi, India; encounter in Holland with Russian Master of Christian-Hermetic tradition on terrace of Sufi temple. This last event changes her life and leads her back to the spiritual homeland of her soul: the Christian core of Freemasonry and the inspiring mysticism of Orthodox Christianity. In a supplementary chapter a discourse on 'Faust in the 21 st century'.