In these five travelogues, Steve Dyster attempts to demonstrate that there is much more to cycling than riding a bicycle (thanks to Paul Wagner for that adage). Be it nattering to the locals in varied and hybrid versions of their language or warning generous hosts about his biscuit consumption, it is the people and the things that don’t quite go as expected that provide the longest memories. Can he retrieve Louise’s bra? What are the mysterious footsteps in the dead of night? Can you really see around a corner? Can you buy two oranges in Andalucia? Can a tandem survive a lightning strike? Whether in the Cotswolds, the Sierra Nevada, the South of France, Ulster, or central Italy, the Grand Plan rarely survives. Full of good examples of what not to do, and maybe the odd bit of sound advice, this is not a manual on how to cycle tour, just Steve's take on a handful of his cycle trips.